Q. My ex has been complaining that I don’t limit our daughters’ social media sufficiently. He filed a modification asking to modify our equal parenting plan to sole custody for him because of my “neglect” of our teenagers after school. I work full time and he “consults” earning just enough to avoid paying child support. He claims if he has them after school every day, he will engage with them, and they won’t be on their phones using social media.
My 15-year-old just told me she discovered he made a fake account and has been posing as a 16-year-old boy, friending all of her friends, and asking all kinds of questions about her. She is mortified and is now refusing to spend any time with him.
My 13-year-old sees how this is impacting her sister and has just shut down all of her social media and also refuses to talk to him. He claims I am alienating them. The divorce was a terrible process – I don’t know if I can do this again but feel like I need to protect my daughters. How can I help them?
A. You should file a counterclaim for modification seeking primary custody of your daughters and child support. Then file a motion asking the court to appoint an attorney for your children. Given their ages and his conduct, an attorney for the children is likely more appropriate than a Guardian Ad Litem. An attorney will talk with them and advocate for their position in court. Their attorney can conduct discovery on the children’s behalf and present evidence at hearings. A Guardian Ad Litem would be tasked with conducting an investigation and making recommendations on what parenting plan is in the children’s best interests. If the court denies the appointment of the attorney for the children, then you can ask for a GAL.
For your custody case, you should gather as much as you can about the fake profile your ex created and who he has been contacting. Ask which “friend” is the fake one, then see what parts of that profile are public. Screen shot everything you can in case he takes his account down. Back up your screen shots.
If your children don’t already have a therapist, now is the time to get that in place. While it may have come from a good place, his decisions here will likely have a serious impact on your children.
Email questions to whickey@brickjones.com
