Q. My husband and I agreed we would get long-term care insurance once our children finished college. Rather than retire together as planned, my husband filed for divorce. Now, he does not want to pay for my travel or long-term care insurance.

Our youngest graduated from college in May and he told me he put his paperwork in to retire at the end of the year. He worked in finance for 30 years and did well but we spent a lot on our children, including putting the oldest through medical school and the other two through private colleges. Our investment account took a big hit.

He says I am not going to get alimony because he is 65 and has the right to retire. He wants me to keep him on my health insurance until I retire from teaching – I am five years younger. He says we will equalize our retirement and other investments and sell our home. He plans to take his share and move south where he can buy a house on a golf course in cash while I will struggle to find housing in our town where I teach. My lawyer says all I can do is put my expenses on my financial form for the judge to consider.

A. You should get a second opinion.

Yes, your financial statement should reflect current expenses. However, if there are expenses that were put off on account of funding children’s education, you can add footnotes to that effect. You can also add footnotes about the budget for college and how those funds were intended to shift to cover travel and long-term care insurance. A judge will consider your needs and your husband’s ability to pay in structuring alimony.

Your husband is under the mistaken impression that he can retire early to avoid paying alimony. At 65 he has not actually reached normal retirement age as defined by Social Security for alimony purposes.

Because you are younger and need reasonable housing near your job, he should not be so quick to assume the judge will order the house sold and the proceeds equally divided. Give the judge options, in lieu of alimony, ask for an unequal division of the equity in the house because you have to stay and work for several more years – especially where he is relying on your health insurance. When you retire, downsize, buy long-term care insurance and travel the world.

Email questions to whickey@brickjones.com