Q. My ex-wife wants to send our daughter, Emily, to boarding school in Connecticut for high school – she is offering to pay all of the costs. I am a teacher and recognize this would be a great opportunity for Emily but I have concerns.
Emily has lived with me since the divorce 10 years ago – my ex travels extensively and they are not close. I am worried that this is a ploy for my ex to stop paying me child support and for her to claim that our daughter now lives in CT with my ex’s mother. I don’t know the laws in CT and whether child support is the same or if I have to give up child support if Emily goes to boarding school. I planned to keep our home until Emily graduates from high school then sell it and move to a less expensive town to help finance college. Without the child support payments, I cannot afford to keep the house.
A. Child support is paid until a child is emancipated. If a child living away at college during the school year does not trigger emancipation (it does not), then certainly a child living away at boarding school for high school does not trigger emancipation. This means child support would still be paid. It may be that your ex would try to reduce child support by claiming your daughter is living away from you during most of the year and she is directly paying for room and board. You still have the argument that she comes home to you every break / summer and you provide her with a home, food, clothing, etc. and thus should still receive child support.
Connecticut would not have jurisdiction to make changes to child support unless your daughter actually changed her home state or domicile to Connecticut. If she applies and goes to boarding school, make sure your home address is used for everything on file and that you, as the custodial parent, are the primary contact. Make sure she continues to see her Massachusetts doctor, dentist, etc.
Assuming Emily gets accepted and wants to go, you should enter a written agreement with your ex that specifically states your agreement for Emily to attend boarding school is subject to your ex paying all associated costs, Emily’s home state remains Massachusetts, and her domicile remains your home address. .
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