Q. My husband fancies himself a social media influencer. His obsession with his phone and documenting all aspects of his life is exhausting and, in part, the reason for the divorce. I have insisted on restricting our kids’ access to phones/social media. I want that to continue – they are 12 and 10. He is trying to add social medial provisions into the agreement we are negotiating. He proposes the kids be given phones and unrestricted access to social media upon their 13th birthdays. This is becoming a deal breaker on both sides.

I am thinking about seeking sole custody to deal with these issues. If I refuse to include his phone and social media provisions, do you think a judge will side with him?

A. I am not aware of any reported decisions involving social media restrictions in a divorce situation. However, many of the judges are also parents and/or grandparents who have also had to learn to navigate protecting their own families and their use of social media. This is a rapidly changing area where I suspect courts will appreciate a more conservative approach as opposed to what your describe of your husband’s potentially unhealthy approach.

All child-related provisions are approached from the best interest of the child perspective. If it comes to it, I suspect your husband will be hard pressed to find an expert in child development who will support his desire to provide your children with phones and unfettered access to social media and the internet in the near future.

From a legal custody perspective, you can ask the judge to award you sole decision making authority with regard to access to cell phones, social media and the internet for the children. It may be you can convince a judge that you also need primary physical custody so you can ensure they do not have access to phones / social media but it will be hard to police what happens during his parenting time and he will surely have parenting time.

If you learn that your husband is providing the children with access to devices and social media in his home, you can return to court for further protections and modifications later.

Email questions to whickey@brickjones.com